The Beginning

This past weekend I attended a church retreat called Reality Weekend with my youth group. All weekend Afshin Ziafat spoke about things God called you to do. Toward the end of his last service with us he talked about testimonies. How you are called to share what God has done in your life. That no one's testimony is "boring." I mean come on! It's the story of God bringing you to life! Before accepting God, you were dead! Psalm 68:20 "Our God is a God who saves! The Sovereign LORD rescues us from death." After each service the home you're staying in has a little discussion time. My youth pastor, Mark Cox, asked me lead the discussion this weekend, and I am so grateful! If you want to get people to open up, the best way to do it is to share some of your story. Getting to do that this weekend started a burning fire in me. I have decided I am going to start sharing my story more. So, let's start from the beginning.
The side of the family I've seen and grown up with the most are my Nottos. Think big Italian, Catholic family. As a young child I assumed the title of Catholic. (Now before I get into this, let me state. I am NOT attacking anyone. I love my family. And I have seen many Catholics following God's heart. And I understand there are many things about what they believe I will never understand. This is just my story.) I went to church as a "Catholic" very few times. I saw God as this big mighty guy in the sky. I had to do all these things all the times, or else I would get smighted. I thought I had to follow all these rules, and if I didn't I was out of the game. My relationship felt as only a judgement. I thought getting to heaven meant I had to do all these right things, and that I was completely screwed because I would never be able to do it all. My relationship was basically nonexistent.
In fifth grade my beautiful Lennie Ellen, my sweet grandmother, died. She was one of the closest people to God I have ever seen. I think it was the first time my heart truly broke. And I didn't understand it. How could God, the guy who's supposed to love me, take her away! She was so close to him and yet I only ever got to see her as sick, and in pain. How could that be?! If God loved me so much why did he take her away?
Around that time my brother started going to a Wednesday night service at Indian Springs with my neighbors. He went for a while, and got my older sister to start going. For a long time I thought Indian Springs was a joke. Just a place they were going to have fun and hang out with their friends. I turned my nose up feeling like they betrayed us by going to a Baptist church. Also around this time I was begging my mom to get me into Catholic classes. Everyone had this God, and I needed to be a part of something. Typically as a Catholic you are baptized as a baby, ironically enough, I wasn't. So at the time I felt even more rushed to belong.
Sixth grade used to be the age you could start attending Indian Springs' youth group, Ten10. I hadn't started classes yet, so my first week of sixth grade I went to Ten10. I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. My brother had already stopped going, but my sister still was. I went my whole sixth grade year, and at that time I was just having fun. I met a lot of people, and brought my friends and it was a party every week. It definitely kept me coming back. But I still didn't quite understand the whole God thing. The next school year, I went back. But that fall my mom started asking me about signing up for Catholic classes. I was horrified. I had a couple of months to make a decision. Around that time a youth worker I was and am very close to (I'm going to have to write a blog on that beautiful lady later) jokingly commented on how my friends and I mostly talked through the services. I didn't see it that way before. So instead of talking, I started listening. In just a few weeks of listening I really started learning about this God. The one all of these new friends of mine from church had. Then the time came. I had to make a decision. Leave this new and exciting group I had found and was very curious about, or go to what I was expected to. First off, I love my mother. But the problem was she's always had the vision, wanting, of her as a proud momma with all of her little catholic babies at church with her. I didn't want to disappoint her, but I had this feeling that I couldn't leave my youth group! Not knowing what was ahead I told my mom I wasn't going to classes.
I continued to listen. A few weeks later I was in worship singing "Our God is greater, our God is stronger, God you are higher than any other. Our god is HEALER" and it hit me. I could never live perfectly, but God loves me so much that he'll forgive all of my sins. 1 John 1: 9 "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." Following what God wanted was a really scary thought, but now that I knew about it, I couldn't miss the opportunity. It was at that time that I realized I was saved. I asked God into my heart and to forgive all of my sins. I realized he wasn't a god ready to squash anyone who didn't follow his rules. He is the God waiting for you with open arms. He loves you and wants a relationship with you. He wants to give you the best life possible with him forever!
 After the service and I ran up to Mark and told him I wanted to be baptized! Then I got another hit. I had to tell my mom I was going to be baptized. That I was officially a Baptist. I was terrified of telling her, of officially shattering that catholic babies dream. But she came, she supported me. Luckily I have parents who know their kids relationship with God, even if it's not where they expected it to be (ISBC), is the most important thing. On November 19th, 2008 I was baptized.

Above is just the beginning of the story of what God has done in my life. I'm sure I'll be sharing a lot more later ;)
I can't believe all that God has done since then! I have run away so may times, and He always fights back for my heart! He has brought so many great role models to show me how to live a passionate life for God. I have definitely become who I am today through Ten10 showing the the everlasting GRACE of GOD.