God's Blessings

  "When we consider the blessings of God—the gifts that add beauty and joy to our lives, that enable us to keep going through stretches of boredom and even suffering—friendship is very near the top." -Donald W. McCullough
  My last post was about how God has a plan for everything; specifically the bad. This go around I would like to tell you about all the GOOD he has put in my life! My heart just smiles about this subject; my MVPs. The most valuable people God has put in my life!
  I am a very strong believer in keeping good company. Having the people closest to you, the ones you tell everything to, and go to for advice as strong Christians. People who are constantly going to encourage you in your walk with God. As Mark Cox has said MANY times, "Show me your friends, and I can show you your future." Proverbs 12:26 "One who is righteous is a guide to his neighbor, but the way of the wicked leads them astray." Proverbs 13:20 "Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm." 1 Corinthians 15:33 "Do not be deceived: 'Bad company ruins good morals.'" Proverbs 11:14 "Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counselors there is safety." Proverbs 27:17 "Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another." Bottom line, it is very important to have good friends!
  I know for a fact God has placed some truly wonderful people in my life! First off, he placed me in a wonderful family filled with so much love! A family that is always trying to do things for one another. Secondly he has given me some great friends! For instance, Kylee Gattin. We've been friends since the 4th grade (if they can make it through the awkward middle school years, you better keep them!!) Or my gorgeous best friend, Madeline Coltharp, who is a true beauty at heart! But most of all I would l o v e to tell you about my church family!
  When I say family, I mean it! I would do absolutely anything for that exceptional group of people! Ten10 is definitely where I've gotten the majority of my views on life, and on God. Mentioned below are just a handful of people God has blessed me with! If I went through everyone who has impacted me from ISBC, we'd be here for awhile.

• Let's start with the Pilcher family. I know God gave me them, I have been just completely wrapped in love by Mrs. Becky, Emily, and Bethany. I first met Emily in the 7th grade. We both volunteered to help with mailers from church. She has been there for me through so much! The love and teachings of God are constantly spilling out of that beautiful girl! When we first met she mentioned that if I ever decided to come on Sundays her mom would be my Small Group leader! In 8th grade a youth worker (she's coming up soon, promise!) suggested that I come with her to church on Sunday! Of course I took the opportunity and went! That's when I met Mrs. Becky! One of the sweetest people you'll ever meet! I first met Bethany, Emily's little sister, at Beach Camp in 2009! Once again God gave me another amazing, sweet, beautiful Pilcher girl to constantly encourage me!

• Next up, Mark and Christi Cox. Indian Springs got a bus load of awesomeness when this couple rolled into town! I can only explain Mark Cox as like the best, pesky older brother possible. Pesky as in, he's a little turd sometimes. He likes to pick on us even though we have never done anything to provoke him. (That statement is the quintessence of sarcasm!) But he is, hands down, the best! You couldn't ask for a better guy to lead you through scripture and the lessons and plans God has for you! He is one of the best examples I've seen of someone living their life for Christ! And then there is his amazing wife, Christi. Like a mother to us all! Always there for us! Hilarious, full of love, and beautiful! They are the ones that definitely have taught me the most about relationships. Want your relationships to work out? Keep God first and foremost! Actually, if you always keep God that way, yes you'll have to go through some battles, but in the end God wins! Indian Springs could not have picked a better couple to look out for their youth group!

• A more recent, awesome person God has added to my life is Katie Clifton. You can tell just from spending a few minutes with her that God has touched her heart! And through that she is reaching so many others! Her constant passion, love, and fire for God is almost shocking at first! I was astounded before even really getting to know her and now I'm just awe-struck! God shows me so much with every conversation! A few weeks ago I was feeling completely torn down, broken, lost. I decided to text Katie about whatever was going on and while we were talking she told me to read Psalm 31:22-24 "In my alarm I said,“I am cut off from your sight!” Yet you heard my cry for mercy when I called to you for help. Love the Lord, all his saints! The Lord preserves the faithful, but the proud he pays back in full. Be strong and take heart, all you who hope in the Lord"  For the past couple of years have been rough and I had been yelling "I am cut off from your sight!" But God was always there, he was always listening, just waiting for me to come back to him! I can't tell you how many times I've read that verse in the past month or so! God is working through Katie and my relationship! I'm just so excited to see what else he's going to do!

• And now, finally, the woman I could just tell the world about every single day and never run out of good things to say, the mom I got to choose, Shaleen Phillips. I will never be able to fully express how much I love, admire, and truly appreciate Mrs. Shaleen! She's the woman who finally got me to shut up and really listen in church. Which led to me being saved and baptized in 7th grade. She is the person who got me going to Small Groups. She is the reason I stayed in school the day my grandpa died, because the only person I wanted to see and hug in the whole world was her. God has used her to completely transform me. Shaleen Phillips: a strong, beautiful, unbelievably amazing woman who is always doing for others. You want to meet someone who shows how to be like the hands and feet of Jesus? Yeah, that's her! God has continually blessed me through knowing Mrs. Shaleen!  ♥

  Are you seeing the common theme with all of these great people? LOVE! God's love! They are not only effecting my life, but every one around them! God loves them, and you, so much! And they share that love with others! 1 Corinthians 13:1-3 "If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing." IT'S ALL ABOUT LOVE! GOD LOVES US! He sent his one and only son to pay the ultimate price just so he can have a relationship with you!! It astounds me every time I hear it!
1 Corinthians 13:13
"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."

A Plan For Every Rocky Situation

God has a plan for everything in your life. Everything that happens, bad or good, it is all for a reason. I'm sure you've heard it many times before, but it's because it's completely true! Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope."
The Bad: The part no one really like to talk about.
Whether it is to teach you a lesson about life or to flip you up side down and get you to do things differently, God has a plan for the bad stuff. My grandmother's death brought me so low that only God's love, forgiveness, and grace could have pulled me out. He saved me. He also brought be a lot closer to my family. For 2 years straight I went to Helena with my mom every weekend. I would say Grandma's death marked the ending of my little kid age. I saw my Nottos every holiday, but it was always the same. All of us cousins went up stairs and played. (Don't get me wrong, it was a blast) But I was completely missing the wonderful group of adults downstairs. I am so grateful for those two years. I really got to know my aunts and uncles. I mean, of course, I loved them before, but it was always "Hi how are you?" Hug. Go up stairs and play. But most of all I am thankful for my time with Grandpa. He went to go meet up in Heaven with his wife on October 6th, 2010, in my 9th grade year. And that was the second time my heart broke.
That year I also had to leave my beautiful Shilling and move up to the high school. Mrs. Shilling was my Civics teacher, and sponsor over the Green Team at BJH. Yeah, I know that may sound silly to most of you. Being completely torn up by leaving a teacher. But she was never just a teacher. A constant mentor, like having the perfect mix of mom and best friend at school with me every day. Talking to her about every little problem, whether it was just feeling down, or my grandpa passing away. She saw every side of me: happy, bitter, completely broken. Everything. And I will always count her as a mother. Also that year my beautiful sister, Madeline, and for sure best friend, Emily Pilcher, were graduating. I was angry at God. Furious. He was taking everyone away from me! Shilling my rock at school, Madeline my rock to every bad moment at home, Emily my rock for everywhere and everything.
Why was this happening to me? No, I wasn't the best Christian. I only read my bible at church. I didn't curse, I tried to be nice to people as much as possible, I didn't party or anything, and I was at church every time to doors were open. No, I wasn't the best, but I wasn't horrible. Again I was left confused and furious with God. What was he doing?! I was bitter. I was angry. I was sad. It took me until beach camp that summer to grasp that I was putting those people above God. While I understood a little more, I was still so heartbroken. I was not putting anything into my relationship with Christ.
While I had gotten hints on what I should do, actually I was basically full out told for two years, I refused it. I ran away. I spent a long time running. Especially recently. With once again my whole group of friends about to graduate, I've been pretty messed up. Spending quite a few hours feeling alone and just sobbing in my room. And that's where Katie Clifton comes in. Her love, obedience, and radical passion for God has made me start rethinking things. And until about two weeks ago I hadn't really stopped running from God.
God doesn't want some of my heart. He doesn't just want it when he has to finally crush me down, or that Sunday every once in a while when I'm really feeling good in worship. He wants me. ALL of me! For me to every day die to myself and follow him. Luke 9:23-24 "Then he said to them all: “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it." To have faith in him in all situations. Psalm 62:8 "Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge." I am broken. And God is once again there (knowing he never really left) to pick up the pieces. Forging me in the fire to make a true follower. This weekend really solidified the steps I've been taking. Trying to read my bible before a few weeks ago was a check list, it felt like work. Now, I find my self in God's word a few times a day! Seeing what he has to show me through his word! And not just there! I'm thinking and talking to God all day! Trying to see what paths I should take in my every day life! I can already feel Satan trying to slip his way back in my life, but I AM NOT ALLOWING IT! God alone is giving the strength and faith I need!

James 1:2-3 "Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance."
Romans 8:28 "And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose."
John 14:6 "Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me"
At some point in 8th grade, Mark asked us to pray a bold prayer. To pray for God to put us through trials so we could become closer to him. I prayed that prayer and I got shaken. And I'm finally fully reawakened to God. I can't express to you enough how happy I am! While God is still doing some rearranging in my heart, I have peace. He is giving me that. While my faith is still constantly being tested, I bring it right back to him, and his word! I AM SO EXCITED TO SEE WHAT GOD HAS IN STORE!

The Beginning

This past weekend I attended a church retreat called Reality Weekend with my youth group. All weekend Afshin Ziafat spoke about things God called you to do. Toward the end of his last service with us he talked about testimonies. How you are called to share what God has done in your life. That no one's testimony is "boring." I mean come on! It's the story of God bringing you to life! Before accepting God, you were dead! Psalm 68:20 "Our God is a God who saves! The Sovereign LORD rescues us from death." After each service the home you're staying in has a little discussion time. My youth pastor, Mark Cox, asked me lead the discussion this weekend, and I am so grateful! If you want to get people to open up, the best way to do it is to share some of your story. Getting to do that this weekend started a burning fire in me. I have decided I am going to start sharing my story more. So, let's start from the beginning.
The side of the family I've seen and grown up with the most are my Nottos. Think big Italian, Catholic family. As a young child I assumed the title of Catholic. (Now before I get into this, let me state. I am NOT attacking anyone. I love my family. And I have seen many Catholics following God's heart. And I understand there are many things about what they believe I will never understand. This is just my story.) I went to church as a "Catholic" very few times. I saw God as this big mighty guy in the sky. I had to do all these things all the times, or else I would get smighted. I thought I had to follow all these rules, and if I didn't I was out of the game. My relationship felt as only a judgement. I thought getting to heaven meant I had to do all these right things, and that I was completely screwed because I would never be able to do it all. My relationship was basically nonexistent.
In fifth grade my beautiful Lennie Ellen, my sweet grandmother, died. She was one of the closest people to God I have ever seen. I think it was the first time my heart truly broke. And I didn't understand it. How could God, the guy who's supposed to love me, take her away! She was so close to him and yet I only ever got to see her as sick, and in pain. How could that be?! If God loved me so much why did he take her away?
Around that time my brother started going to a Wednesday night service at Indian Springs with my neighbors. He went for a while, and got my older sister to start going. For a long time I thought Indian Springs was a joke. Just a place they were going to have fun and hang out with their friends. I turned my nose up feeling like they betrayed us by going to a Baptist church. Also around this time I was begging my mom to get me into Catholic classes. Everyone had this God, and I needed to be a part of something. Typically as a Catholic you are baptized as a baby, ironically enough, I wasn't. So at the time I felt even more rushed to belong.
Sixth grade used to be the age you could start attending Indian Springs' youth group, Ten10. I hadn't started classes yet, so my first week of sixth grade I went to Ten10. I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. My brother had already stopped going, but my sister still was. I went my whole sixth grade year, and at that time I was just having fun. I met a lot of people, and brought my friends and it was a party every week. It definitely kept me coming back. But I still didn't quite understand the whole God thing. The next school year, I went back. But that fall my mom started asking me about signing up for Catholic classes. I was horrified. I had a couple of months to make a decision. Around that time a youth worker I was and am very close to (I'm going to have to write a blog on that beautiful lady later) jokingly commented on how my friends and I mostly talked through the services. I didn't see it that way before. So instead of talking, I started listening. In just a few weeks of listening I really started learning about this God. The one all of these new friends of mine from church had. Then the time came. I had to make a decision. Leave this new and exciting group I had found and was very curious about, or go to what I was expected to. First off, I love my mother. But the problem was she's always had the vision, wanting, of her as a proud momma with all of her little catholic babies at church with her. I didn't want to disappoint her, but I had this feeling that I couldn't leave my youth group! Not knowing what was ahead I told my mom I wasn't going to classes.
I continued to listen. A few weeks later I was in worship singing "Our God is greater, our God is stronger, God you are higher than any other. Our god is HEALER" and it hit me. I could never live perfectly, but God loves me so much that he'll forgive all of my sins. 1 John 1: 9 "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." Following what God wanted was a really scary thought, but now that I knew about it, I couldn't miss the opportunity. It was at that time that I realized I was saved. I asked God into my heart and to forgive all of my sins. I realized he wasn't a god ready to squash anyone who didn't follow his rules. He is the God waiting for you with open arms. He loves you and wants a relationship with you. He wants to give you the best life possible with him forever!
 After the service and I ran up to Mark and told him I wanted to be baptized! Then I got another hit. I had to tell my mom I was going to be baptized. That I was officially a Baptist. I was terrified of telling her, of officially shattering that catholic babies dream. But she came, she supported me. Luckily I have parents who know their kids relationship with God, even if it's not where they expected it to be (ISBC), is the most important thing. On November 19th, 2008 I was baptized.

Above is just the beginning of the story of what God has done in my life. I'm sure I'll be sharing a lot more later ;)
I can't believe all that God has done since then! I have run away so may times, and He always fights back for my heart! He has brought so many great role models to show me how to live a passionate life for God. I have definitely become who I am today through Ten10 showing the the everlasting GRACE of GOD.